To the passerby, Bronze Fondue is nothing more than a group of wildly talented musicians/middle-aged has-beens delivering mind-blowing rock experiences and wince-inducing emotional breakdowns each and every night. But for the pop music foodie willing to dig to the bottom of the vat of melted chocolate, a real treat awaits.
Bronze Fondue was founded on July 4, 1976 in Alphabet City and quickly infiltrated the CBGB's scene of the late 1970s, sharing stage time and eyeliner with The Ramones, Blondie, Talking Heads and Patti Smith. As their star was rising, alas, Bronze Fondue founding member, lead guitarist and principle songwriter, Johnny Marvelous, left the band to pursue a solo career.
Marvelous scored a Top 40 single in 1982 -- "Nice Hair Makes Me Feel Alright", known by many children of the 1980s as the Prell Shampoo jingle -- but perished in a motorcycle accident that same year. Unsubstantiated rumors persist that Mr. Marvelous faked his own death and is living in Eastern Europe.
A slew of substitute players and mediocre gigs later, what was left of Bronze Fondue was pronounced dead halfway through its set opening for a Big Bopper tribute act at the Surf Ballroom in Clear Lake, Iowa in February of 1989.
Cut to the modern era and we find BF's erstwhile front man Huck DeMilo withering away in a soul-crushing cubicle, writing an ode to a vehicle he once owned (allegedly the bike on which Johnny Marvelous took his final ride) called "Motorcycle Jumps". Armed with a demo of the song in his breast pocket and a vision of a Bronze Fondue reunion in his head, DeMilo journeys to see his former bandmates one by one: Greasy Cravings, Teddy Von Boy, The Professor. He makes his case with a wearying mix of artful persuasion, tearful pleading, and Druid trickery. A rehearsal is scheduled!
The long shadow of Johnny Marvelous' absence, however, hangs low over the reconstituted rock juggernaut, and it is decided that he must be replaced. A proper scouring of midtown Manhattan's streets and bars by the band during "Fleet Week" yields former U.S. Navy Rear Admiral, Forrest P. McGillicuddy -- Bronze Fondue's newest member.
The lineup complete, Bronze Fondue is set to launch its "Performing the Victory" tour which, DeMilo is convinced, will exhume them from the trash heap of pop music history. Or something like that.